After a silence that has been too long, I return with a short, rough writeup of half of the Blood Bowl game I’m playing right now. Its basically football mixed with Warcraft, so if anything is unfamiliar/confusing, its ok. I’m playing the Vampires and I’m against a Lizardman team. I’ve got more High Earth stuff complete, but not typed and I’ll be putting it up online when I get around to typing it up, not likely this Saturday, but by next, I promise 🙂 As always, I’ll update my status and post a link to my new post.
And it’s a beautiful day out here ad Blood Bowl Stadium, a sunny sky and already the fans have packed the place full. The game’s official sponsor, Bloodweiser Beer, has generously (and quite possibly foolishly,) supplied both teams with the services of one of their Bloodweiser Babes and a healthy supply of Bloodweiser. A slight breeze across the field is keeping the temperature comfortable and the dust off the field, presenting perfect visibility and playing weather.
Our game today is the vampire Cavity Kings, led by Count Chocula Von Castien, hosting the lizardmen Silithians, captained by the saurus Slvaa’neth. Both captains head out to the center of the pitch for the toss-off, the venerable Count seemingly dwarfed by the huge scaled beast. Now the flip… heads! The Cavity Kings elect to receive at the start of the half and the lizardmen trail onto the field to set up.
The lizardmen set up the bulk of their muscle right on the line of scrimmage, three saurans and the immense kroxigore paired together about five yards from each other. Slvaa’neth sets himself in the rear of his half, able to direct the flow of the game, and his lowly skinks, small fast buggers, spread out to catch any breaks in the line.
Opposing them the vampires set up in a fair line. Chocula stayed toward the endzone, ready to receive the kickoff. Jack and Lucretia squared off against the huge saurans and kroxigore. A few thralls bravely, though some might say stupidly, set themselves up directly opposed to the muscle line given strength by Guinevere, as if daring the lizards to attack them. Finishing off the final wing, Luther and Ricky line up, waiting the kick and start.
And the kickoff, the ball is flying, curving from the sidelines back into the field. A large bounce takes it in between Guinevere and the Count and the match starts. Lucretia charges forward violently, downing and stunning her quarry. Jacob, one of the thralls, curves around and helps surround the fallen lizard. Jack descends on Kronk, the kroxigore, and trips, taking both of them down.
After the momentary vampire surge, the Silithians counter. One of the saurans forces Bella, one of the foolhardy thralls, back while Kronk blitzes forward to do likewise to Lucretia. Three of the skinks surge forward to take up supporting positions while one, a sneaky blue hand, hides behind the downed Jack, flailing away. In a moment of clarity, the ref, a large brutish ogre easily challenging the massive Kronk for size, actually manages to see the foul and blows his whistle, charging the offending skink and tackling if off the pitch, no longer a part of the game.
Chocula notices the momentary distraction and runs toward the ball, untouched thus far. Bobbling the ball, he manages to tuck it in and continue his run forward. Finishing his run with a pass, he snaps off a quick round to Guinevere, who catches the ball neatly and runs forward past a remarkably empty field. Luther and Ricky advance to cover her while Molly and Bella move to the swirl of activity some yards away. Lucretia punches one of the new skinks, a pretty little thing named Vanessa, pushing her back several feet and shadowing closely.
Sprawling from the hit, the skink has a moment of ADD and completely forgets about Lucretia. The flying ball and following catch caught the attention of all the skinks and they charged off toward Guinevere across the melee. Vanessa is completely blindsided as the vampire who had just punched her reaches out grabs her tail, pulling up and slamming the skink to the ground.
Ricky charges and lends a hand to the passing skinks, a strong right hook really, and brings one to the ground, knocked out for a few moments. Luther chases after the pair of skinks that are hounding Guinevere as all eyes turn from the melee and side skirmishes to the lone ball carrier. Tall and fierce, the lady vampire streaks toward the endzone, pushing herself in a grand display of endurance. Feet away from her goal, a bit of stubble trips her up and the ball comes flying out, killing the chance to score for the vampires.
The lizardmen (and women) go crazy; a chance to redeem themselves and score! Kronk and several of his teammates tackle the poor Jacob, who despite his most valiant efforts is brought down and rendered unconscious. Wisp, one of the skinks shadowing Guinevere takes the initiative and scoops up the ball, charges forward a few feet and launches a blind pass downfield. Missing his target by tens of yards, Wisp manages to bounce the ball across the field, where it takes a few odd turns and lands in the surprised, surrounded, and capable thrall Lucy. And just like that their chance is gone!
Jacob recovers consciousness and Jack stands up for the first time in the past few minutes. Lucretia continues the swirl of damage around her and downs another skink, proving that male vampires aren’t necessarily the most dangerous. Lucy thanks her lucky stars and books it, tumbling from the unwelcome arms of a sarus and a skink into the open and hands the ball off to her captain and coach, Chocula. Molly shoves a skink away rudely as Guinevere, stung by her fall and loss of the ball, jumps up. Standing, and screaming with rage, she jumps the skink closest to her, biting and taking a deep drink before letting it fall.
Ricky moves back into the melee to support his fellow thralls and vampire masters, while Bella drops a saurus. Edward, mostly quiet until now, kicks another saurus near him to no effect, but gets his feet dirty, and ruining his pre-game makeup of glitter and sparkles. Chocula is overcome with a need to feed and turns on Lucy, a few feet after having received the ball, draining a small meal of blood and stunning her.
Even as Chocula takes his mid-afternoon meal, Slvaa’neth takes his own. Bella is caught up in the powerful lizardman’s jaws and rent asunder with a wet snap. Even as her body hits the ground, life has clearly already fled. Kronk attacks Lucretia, angry that this pompous vampire would harm so many of his smaller friends and teammates. At first ineffective, a low blow finally connects and she drops in a limp crumple. Being first pushed and then hit, Jack finally goes down, having taken most of the remaining lizardmen attention. The final skink attempts to blitz Guinevere, but is infected with the same clumsiness that was her downfall earlier, and is removed from the pitch in great pain.
While many on the vampire team are down, they seem to vow not to take this casualty lightly. Guinevere ravages the remaining skink near her, and Luther does likewise, removing his from the pitch. Disregarding the ball in his hands momentarily, Chocula beats the skink near him to the ground, fracturing its armor in several places. Jacob tackles another with a cry of anger and Edward, bereft of his sparkles, yells incoherently in angst at the skink Chocula downed and kicked it, stunning it even more and getting tiny glitter in its eyes. Edward is spotted by the ref, who takes pity on the frail thrall, gives him a good backhanding and then carries Edward off to the dungeon to grieve quietly, and reapply his makeup.
Reeling from the sudden assault, the skinks again try to foul, this time targeting Jack, stunning him further. Kronk and Sheela, another saurus, double team Chocula who drops the ball upon hitting the dirt. The ball falls down and bounces away from both Chocula and Kronk, still slick from Chocula’s recent feeding. Vanessa, that failed passer from before, attempts to pick up the ball again, fails to gain purchase on it and accidentally tosses it back at Chocula, hitting him before falling up again.
Guinevere risks pushing her limits again, this time managing herself successfully, and mesmerizes one of the saurans. Lucy manages to stand up, and Jacob engages in a few acrobatics to reposition himself more advantageously. Chocula pushes himself up and his oppressor away in a feat that seems unbecoming of his age, proving perhaps that that snack time isn’t such a bad idea after all. Lucretia stands up and mesmerizes another sauran to help Luther push Kronk away from the ball. Molly finishes off the initiative with a solid push.
Kronk takes offense at Lucy and pushes her away while Ricky is kicked to the floor. Slvaa’neth takes his own shot at Molly, who manages to fall somewhat gracefully to the floor. Vanessa, deciding that her skills lie in the catching and running with the ball, rather than picking up and throwing, runs out to go for a long pass. Venal, a skink knocked down previously, jumps up and charges the ball, intent on hitting Vanessa and then scoring. Stumbling through the gathered players, he makes it to the ball, and reaching out for it can’t seem to find traction enough to make a hold on the wet ball. The ball flies erratically into the hands of Kronk, who is astounded with this small object that has suddenly appeared. Passing it to Lucy, he used too much force, the ball rebounding off of her and back to him. He tries again, with the same results, and decides to give it to Jacob, a little ways off, but fails, again.
Molly takes the hot potatoe moment to jump up and move away some, while Lucretia tumbles fluidly to Kronk and mesmerizes him, laughing as the stupid giant. Free to move as he will, Jacob sprints to the ball and hands it off to Chocula, carefully withdrawing from the bloody Count. Laughing to himself over his thrall’s prudence, and the antics of the childish kroxigore, the Count jogs a few steps away and fires a second quick pass, this time to Molly, who catches the ball neatly. Ricky moves to screen Molly, and Guinevere supports Lucretia’s notion that women vampires are easily the more violent of the sexes by hammering the towering saurus next to her, dropping him neatly to the ground. Not to be outdone, Lucy beats down a skink near her, stunning it. Jack, feeling that he should probably be doing something productive this half, takes out some pent up aggression on a passing skink, who helplessly falls to the ground.
The lizardmen are furious! Lucretia becomes the focus for their anger as most of the team attempts to wail on her. Kronk the giant only manages to push her back a little while Sheela does the same. Finally, their captain manages to force her down, and one of the skinks rushes up to foul her. Amazingly, Lucretia remains relatively unharmed during this entire exchange, possibly due to some remaining hypnotism left over. Lessinar, one of the saurans, decided that Jack hasn’t suffered enough, and tackles him to the floor, taking himself out in the process. Neither is hurt much though.
With seconds left on the clock the vampires fought on with renewed vigor. Spurred on by Lucretia’s heroism and steadfastness, Chocula forsook his own thirst and charged the skink blocking Molly and managed to hypnotize him. Ricky and Guinevere likewise followed suit, just to make sure and the skink flew back, still in a daze. Molly herself maintained a steady head and feet, speeding the ball down the field as everyone held their breath until… TOUCHDOWN! The vampires managed to pull off a goal with only last seconds of the game remaining. After a short victory celebration, they reassembled themselves on the field.
In the final moments of the half, the Silithians ignored the ball and bent their efforts to breaking as many vampires as possible. Kronk finally managed to knock Lucretia down and one of the skinks attached himself to her back, chewing visciously. Once again, the ref took the offending player from the field and to the dungeon. Two of the saurans tackle Guinevere and only manage to push her back a little. And just like that, the first half was over. 1-0, home-team advantage, the Cavity Kings are in the lead!